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3/28/2010

Relationships: My Thoughts on "The Group Date"...



Okay so yes, I am a fan of "kicking it". I LOVE to hang out. Hanging out with both sexes is fun and essential to understanding how different people and the different genders think and process certain situations. I have heard some great suggestions and dialogue and just some awesome stories of what NOT to do while dating.

Recently, there was a trending topic on twitter called #dearfuturehusband/wife and ALL of my friends participated. ALL of them. And while some of them were funny, most were practical and real promises or expectations that they expect or would like to see in their spouses. Number 1, this told me that most of my friends want to get married which is a healthy and positive desire. Two, this let me know that I have some awesome single friends who have actually taken the time to understand that marriage is a relationship of selfless love filled with give and take. I'm glad I am surrounded by excellent people who will make, one day, excellent spouses.

I admit that the trending topic got me to thinking....Am I even ready to get married...what type of spouse will I be...I guess I won't know until I am in that place. And where does that journey begin...dating.

Aaaaaaaaaagh! Oh how I dread the dating process. Like many, I was thrown into the sea of relationships without much preparation and after some failed attempts, I am learning what love is and what the true signs on a genuine companionship between and man and a woman can be. And in my time with certain individuals of the opposite sex (not necessarily romantic interests), I have realized that each guy is just different but essentially, they need the same things: loyalty and trust. I think I'm right when I say that those are the major two.

But more importantly, I've learned that guys are different when in a group vs. one on one. Well I guess people in general are. And I think we as young people do ourselves a disservice by always wanting to participate in the group instead of being bold enough to ask for that one on one time. Even if it doesn't turn into something romantic, how great is it to connect with someone on an individual level. Sometimes we get lost in the group and end up stifling possible unions.

So my stance on the matter; if you want to see someone, do it. If you want to hang out...ask. Don't wait for the group because you may get lost in the shuffle. Groups are safe but most safe things produce the same safe results: more "friends"...

~Cam

1 comment:

Ekemini said...

so true!! you are on point with this bff!