13 weeks. I've officially been aware of Sensa for 1 month (Side note: Who doesn't find out or even suspect that they're pregnant until 8 weeks lol? Denial is real! Had all the symptoms. Just convinced myself it couldn't be).
13 weeks. 27 weeks left. Feels like both an eternity and a blink.
Here's a few things I've learned and experienced about pregnancy:
#1 Parenthood from Day One
I already feel like a mom. I love my baby so much and I pray daily that Sensa will come out perfectly healthy and beautiful. I can't wait to see this kid. I'm in love already and I will do anything to protect this baby. Before I was able to confirm pregnancy I was in such pain from heartburn and a headache. I suffered that whole night, tears and all because I wasn't sure what I could take! A mother's love shows even before the baby comes into the world. I'd rather go through pain than hurt my unborn child.
#2. There's Something in There?
It's sooooooo weird! There's something in there! Man...crazy. A baby? Until I saw my little mooshoo on the ultrasound, It was kind of unreal. Like I'd taken 2 tests and had it confirmed at the doctor's office but unless I was nauseous, I just didn't feel anything. And honestly, unless I'm experiencing a symptom, I still don't. But seeing that little baby that looks just like a baby at only 10 weeks, it was amazing. I saw a head, little stubby legs and arms. I thought I'd cry but I didn't. Maybe because I haven't heard the heartbeat yet. I just started cracking up because the baby was just bouncing around like a silly little kid. It was too funny. The first thing I thought was this kid will definitely be silly like us. I can't wait to have many years of fun with my baby!
#3. I Need My Mommy
I need her more now than ever. I don't agree with all her advice but just hearing her wisdom and what she can remember from twenty-six years ago really soothes me. I'm just glad she's here. She's had two heart attacks and is surviving Lupus so there have been times that I thought she wouldn't make it to see this day. And I'm taking advantage. I'm calling her more and making plans to chill with her more. I love my mommy with her crazy butt!
#4. The Secret Society of Doctor's
It's crazy that once you find out you're expecting, you are also introduced to the Secret Soctiety of Doctors! Who would have thunk that the very people who you didn't even know graduated from community college have actually surpassed the university level, completed medical school, a residency, and are successful practicing doctors *severe side eye*. Is funny! These "doctors" know all there is to know about YOUR pregnancy that is very different from their own. But they know everything you should eat, drink, take, and offer up their advice even without you asking them a question. It's great to have so many doctors in my life but I will stick to The doctors at UCLA and those who I trust and ask for advice. Thanks!
(I'm really not trying to sound crabby and like I don't want advice at all but some people literally badger me and try to scare me and beat me over the head with what they think I should do. I have a plan and a healthcare team. Not one or two doctors but 4 that I see on the regular basis so any other person trying to MAKE me do what they think is best is really annoying and stress producing.)
#5. Everyone's Excited!
I'm completely blessed to be surrounded by such great people. When I tell you that each and every person I told I was pregnant was extremely excited, I'm not exaggerating. It was so heartwarming. I mean what did I expect though? A new life is exciting. It was fun to tell people the news one by one either in person or on the phone (for those who I wouldn't see in person). 86% of the people I told screamed and they screamed loud! Lol. I learned quick to take the phone from my ear after the announcement. I will forever remember that experience!
#6. No Belly, No Love!
When I describe my symptoms (that began before pregnancy was confirmed), people act as if I'm exaggerating. The all day nausea (morning, noon, and night sickness), lack of appetite, poor appetitie (I can only stomach fried chicken, shrimp, bland mashed potatoes, smoothies with a small amount of veggies in it but only if I drink it fast, chicken wings, crackers, fruit snacks, hamburgers and Gatorade!), pregnancy brain (forgetting stuff) and exhaustion are quite real. But when you don't have that belly, people act like your putting on or "milking" the situation when you're really not. In my pregnant opinion, you need just as much help in the first trimester as you do in the third. This exhaustion is real. I have to take naps at school and after I do pretty much anything. Pregnancy is exhausting even in the 1st trimester.
I can't wait until my belly is big and round! People treat the visiablly pregnant so well!
#7. Eat That if You Want To...
The baby rules my life. Sensa says when I can eat, what I can eat,when I can leave the house, and affects my emotions (just imagine the emotional pms symptoms lasting for oh the last 8 weeks of my life...yeah). So one of the secret doctors told me I needed to eat as many vegetables as I can. When I told them everytime I eat a vegetable I either get diarhea or barf my guts out, they told me to still try no matter what. Craziness! I can only eat what will stay down. I've been trying to compensate with baby food pouches of peas and pears or carrots and squash but my doctor told me I was perfectly fine to eat what I could stomach as long as I was taking my prenatal pills. She told me my normal appetite would come back in trimester two. Talk about relief! Who wants to eat the same foods each day.
#8. Hungry All the Time, Hungry All the Time!
I'm hungry all the time! Lol. All the time! Hunger wakes me up. And if I don't eat, I get nauseous. If I eat too much, I get nauseous. So I have to keep snacks around. The baby gets so mad when I don't eat! But sometimes I feel sooooooo hungry but end up eating two bites. Sensa has really earned the nickname. I start eating and before I'm even half done, appetite is gone! Went to a buffet...that was such a joke. I didn't even eat one plate. And all the smells combined? I ended up waiting in the car while O finished his food lol. It was a mess.
#9. Give Me all My Letters Please
Just my personal preference, but I don't like the terms preggo and preggers. They sound silly to me lol. Sorry if I offend. And I'm experiencing all my symptoms so I need all my letters. I am The Pregnant and I'm proud of it!
#10. I'm Changing
I thought I'd rear my child in one way. And I really won't know until the kid gets here. But as of right now, I want to spoil my little miracle baby. I want to protect this child of mine and give them the world. I don't ever want to spank or punish (but I will if needed). I know I will have a sweet little baby. All the things I said I'd do when I became a parent, like be this strict no nonsense mommy, I just don't feel it now. I'm not saying I will let my child run amuck but I just feel like I want to love and hold and cuddle and never let my angel go. I don't ever want to get pregnant again so this may be it for me! This kid will definitely be spoiled!
Dang it! I said I wouldn't spoil but I can't imagine it any other way. But O will be the balance needed. He's a great disciplinarian. We thought it would be the other way around but as life changes, we change.
Ah, pregnancy. This beautiful, weird, crazy, suprising, scary, stressful, and intense experience. I'm only 3 months in and I've officially made it to trimester two! I'm excited. I'm worried. And I have a feeling that everything will be okay. I can't wait to see little Camden or Carter.